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ADMISSIONS 101:

For Families Applying To PreSchool, The Fall Is Admissions Season. Here Are Tips From School Directors, Educational Consultants And One Very Special Mom.

This article is a collection of admissions advice from people who know the game. It is not, however, a full overview of New York City school admissions. If you are unfamiliar with the process of applying to nursery school, we recommend joining the Parents League (parentsleague.org) and reading the pertinent school guides by Victoria Goldman.

Parents are often caught off-guard by how time consuming and anxiety producing the process can be, especially since, by any resonable perspective, your child's future really isn't hanging by a thread.
At the same time, it's a wonderful boon to a family when a child ends up at a school that he or she really likes. The following advice will help you attain that.

Nancy Schulman and Ellen Birnbaum

Director and associate director of the 92nd Street Y Nursery School and co-authors of "Practical Wisdom for Parents: Demystifying The Preschool Years."

NURSERY SCHOOL ADVICE

• Talk to parents whose children attend schools in your neighborhood, but don't listen to advice from people who do not have first-hand experience with a particular school.
• Visit schools while they are is in session, meet the directors and observe the interaction between teachers and children. Things to look for and inquire about: teacher training and retention, teacher/child ratio and a clean, organized, cheerful and adequate space.
• At your child's interview, support your child but allow the teacher to interact with her (e.g., don't talk for the child).
• When going for a school visit, you can tell your child, "we are going to visit a school with fun toys, some children and nice teachers who will play with you."

Gabriella Rowe

Director, the Mandell School

NURSERY SCHOOL ADVICE

• Keep it personal: This process is about your child and your family. No one knows what you need better than you.
• Keep it real: This is preschool! Don't get sucked in by the hype and the hysteria. You won't learn anything useful from it, and you will make yourself and everyone around you crazy.
• Keep your sense of humor: You can almost guarantee that your child will have a poopy diaper or meltdown or get fussy at the most inopportune moment...just chalk it up to the joys of parenting. If the [nursery school] director really knows and loves children, she will too!
• Get to know the director: The director of a school really sets the tone for that school and will be a critical part of you and your child's experience. You should like the director and feel comfortable talking to her.

Wendy Levey

Director, Epiphany Community Nursery School

NURSERY SCHOOL ADVICE

• Tuesday, September 4 was the day when many schools started accepting applications. Many schools will only accept application requests that day. However, others do not, so if you missed the September 4 deadline, start calling around immediately.
• In the course of the process, be nice to whomever you talk to at a school, including the phone receptionist. Nice goes a long way, whereas snappy, snippy and sarcastic will achieve low results!
• Send in the application as quickly as possible, and read all the materials the school sends you so you know, for example, whether the school will contact you next or whether it is up to you to set up an appointment.
• Be yourself on your interview; grandstanders and name-droppers are not high on our lists of appealing families.

Donna Cohen

Director, Claremont Children's School

Nursery School Advice

• Cast your net wide, especially if you're a new family that can't benefit from a sibling policy.
• Become educated in the various early childhood philosophies and approaches so that you understand the differences in the various preschool programs. Child centered, teacher directed, pre-academic, progressive, traditional, etc.-learn them all, because each has its subtleties that might make it the best fit for your child and family.
• As tempting as it may be, there is no need to give us a hard sell about your 2-year-old. Just be real and realistic.

Shea Cohen, mom

(Shea is the fictionalized name of a New York City mom who was one of three mothers profiled in the book "The Kindergarten Wars: The Battle to Get into America's Best Private Schools," by Alan Eisenstock. She has three children who attend a mix of private and public schools in the city.)

NURSERY SCHOOL ADVICE

• Focus on schools in your neighborhood (if there are enough good ones). It will make your life easier in innumerable and important ways, especially when it comes to getting to school on time and facilitating play dates.
• If you want to send your child to a church/synagogue school, join when he or she is a baby-and participate. Many churches/synagogues will give priority to experienced members but will not if you join in September of the year you are applying.
• Talk to friends and others about the schools that their children attend. This is a great way to learn about the programs and the types of families that go to that school. You can get honest information that you may not always get on a tour or interview.
• Introduce your child to many different types of pasta! On one interview, my daughter was asked about her favorite pasta, and she answered penne, farfalle and orecchiette. She did not get accepted to that school, but at least for one day I thought she had a really good shot!

Roxana Reid

Founder of SmartCityKids

NURSERY SCHOOL ADVICE

• It's a good idea to apply to more schools than you think is necessary, because some of the schools may have very little room due to sibling policies. Plus, later on, you can always eliminate schools based on your experiences at the tours and interviews.
• Be flexible regarding morning or afternoon programs. Schools will often have more spaces in the afternoon than in the morning programs. If you really love a school, let it know that you will accept either slot.
• Don't listen to the park bench gossip. Some of it is right, but some of it is just gossip. It'll be hard to distinguish which is which, so it's best not take any of it too seriously.